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Here we are with your obsession.
Jul. 12th, 2006 08:23 amToday is going to be a long day.
It's my first day back on 12-hour shifts, so around 3 PM I'm going to be dying to go home and I'll still have three hours left. Plus, I could not fall asleep for anything last night, so I'm running on four hours of sleep, tops. And I won't be able to make up any of that time since I'm working the next five days straight. I need some night shifts, bad.
I'm back from my hometown, obviously. The visit was nice, I guess, it's a friend's birthday today so I was able to get her a present in advance, but the weekend kind of dragged because I was feeling worn out the whole time and sort of...out of place.
I love my hometown, and I love my friends there, but it seems as time goes by we're growing more and more different. Life there seems to be all about partying and finding a guy to share your time with and having babies, none of which are my thing. It was odd to sit there and listen to the girls chat on about stuff that's so exciting and important to them and so not a part of my life in the slightest.
All this got me wondering if I will ever feel at home, anywhere. I have a home here in the Twin Cities, I guess, but I've always felt that I'm only here because I couldn't get a job up north, and that I'd move back home if I were ever able to. I have no social life here. People my age tend to start thinking about buying houses, and I haven't even considered it. I'm not interested in committing myself to this place. And yet I'm starting to feel like I don't belong in my hometown either, and that I don't really have anyone, anywhere...
It's my first day back on 12-hour shifts, so around 3 PM I'm going to be dying to go home and I'll still have three hours left. Plus, I could not fall asleep for anything last night, so I'm running on four hours of sleep, tops. And I won't be able to make up any of that time since I'm working the next five days straight. I need some night shifts, bad.
I'm back from my hometown, obviously. The visit was nice, I guess, it's a friend's birthday today so I was able to get her a present in advance, but the weekend kind of dragged because I was feeling worn out the whole time and sort of...out of place.
I love my hometown, and I love my friends there, but it seems as time goes by we're growing more and more different. Life there seems to be all about partying and finding a guy to share your time with and having babies, none of which are my thing. It was odd to sit there and listen to the girls chat on about stuff that's so exciting and important to them and so not a part of my life in the slightest.
All this got me wondering if I will ever feel at home, anywhere. I have a home here in the Twin Cities, I guess, but I've always felt that I'm only here because I couldn't get a job up north, and that I'd move back home if I were ever able to. I have no social life here. People my age tend to start thinking about buying houses, and I haven't even considered it. I'm not interested in committing myself to this place. And yet I'm starting to feel like I don't belong in my hometown either, and that I don't really have anyone, anywhere...
